Thursday, August 25, 2016

Girls trip to Sabah

Memorial weekend after I had my HSG test, Mary, Kak Ju, Nini and I got to fly down to KK to spend three blissful days hanging out with our dear friend from uni, Jessica. The five of us studied together in UPM SIX years ago so we decided a reunion was a great excuse for me to ditch the husband and my little girl and have some serious girl-time in Sabah. Lucky for us Jess is an amazing host and planned everything out perfectly.

A few of the highlights were our stay at J Residence, the upside-down house in Tamparuli, Kundasang wet market, Desa Cattle Farm Kundasang, Luanti River Kelah fish spa and Sabah tea farm.

It was so refreshing to be with old friends and enjoy my first trip to north Borneo... and I can officially declare that I have covered most of the states in Malaysia (haven't cover Labuan yet!). yipsss!

My Instagram update for this photo: Waking up to this! -Our stay at J Residence Kundasang, the view is so breathtaking :)
Enjoying my morning view:)
The five of us at Desa Cattle farm Kundasang. The view of Kinabalu mount was blocked by the thick cloud.

We then headed to Tagal Luanti in Ranau and had fun time soaking our feet in the river and tickled by Klah fishes. You can see our funny faces and those are really sweet memories of us!
Our epic jump at Sabah tea after lunch.
We had great dish at Jalan Tuaran; Lokan.
Later that night we had dinner at the foot hill of Mount Kinabalu.
We had local food dish named Hinava Sada (Raw Fish Salad) that taste so great I almost finished up the whole plate :)

The day before upon arrival in KK, we went to the upside-down house located in Tamparuli. Nothing much except the upside down house and all the furniture that has been glued upside down on the ceiling-technically the floor of the house. You need to pay RM10 for the entrance.
Our Prado ride a.k.a Jess' parents car :) hehe!
Mary and I at the foothill of Mount Kinabalu
Kak Ju and I shopping at the wet market Kundasang..
We also had durian session somewhere at the roadside heading to Kundasang. I can say the trip was great and I really hope that we can spent more time together like this. Ok let's plan for our next trip girlsss!!!!

Sunday, August 21, 2016

Mom bestie

Building a close relationship with my 5- year old daughter has been a journey. Don't get me wrong, from the moment I felt those first kicks in my belly I love her fiercely and when I held her in my arms for the very first time, I knew she will have my heart forever.

However, as a parent you quickly learn that while you technically do hold all the control in the parent-child relationship, you really have no control. If your 2-year-old decides it is her life mission to refuse to wear socks and shoes, chances are she will be going shoeless that day.

The terrible twos were beyond terrible and three was in a completely different realm. . . like who came up with 'terrible twos??' Two was NOTHING compared to how terrible age three was.err..and four.

Today, Aulia' and I have a very special bond. We've work through many things and I now better understand her personality and what she needs and she better understand how she should behave and how to communicate in a way that benefits us all. Growth is a miraculous thing. The age of five has been a game changer. Whereas a year ago it was at times like a war zone during the bedtime routine, she now sweetly ask me to carry her up to bed. Some nights I can't hold back my tears of happiness thinking just how far we've come in her five short years. She love me. She really, really, really loved me. And the love I fell in return is so the best way possible.

You are mom bestie, darling!
My sweet little Aulia' :)

Thursday, August 18, 2016

Aulia' is 5!

Happy 5th birthday to my biggest girl!!

We've got a lot of changes and transitions happening in our family right now, not the least of which is us moving from KL to Ipoh and the next month to KL again and to Shah Alam this year end. Aulia' started her kindy at a brand new school in Ipoh for the past four months and I'm so proud to say that Aulia' is handling everything like a champ so far. I love this little girl with all my heart.

This was her birthday celebration at Tadika ABS Taman Cempaka Ipoh:)


I hope she will remember these moments and all of her friends here; Wardina, Amna, Aisya, Annisa and the month we'll be moving back to KL and she will soon start her school session at her previous kindy. Personally I think she like it more here than her previous school. She had so much fun for the past four months where she had the school trip to the state zoo, Ramadhan programme, sports day, archery, prayers time and lotsa birthday celebrations :) I just hope they will meet again in future. And.. Happy birthday to you my little princess. You are sweet, kind hearted and I fell in love with you all over again. It felt like yesterday you was in my tummy and at the blink of an eyes, you have grown to this amazing lovely girl. Mom loves you so much Aulia'  

Monday, July 25, 2016

TTC Part 8: HSG Test Result

So last week, I did the HSG Test (Hysterosalpingogram) which is fallopian tube patency test. Kenapa buat? Sebab we've been curious about our unexplained infertility for 5 years. After consistently visiting my gynae every month since earlier this year and masih unable to conceive, doctor suggested that I undergo the HSG test to determine the tubal patent. 

Test ni perlu dibuat after period and before you expect your ovulation. In between la kira and make sure you did not BD before the test. So lebih kurang CD10 akak datang untuk buat test. During CD1 lagi dah buat appointment untuk datang pukul berapa and to check whether doctor available atau dia ada operation or what not during that day. 

So masa ni buat kat KPJ Ipoh, datang dengan husband because takut balik nanti tak boleh nak drive sendiri. Terus pegi bahagian Radiology (X Ray) bawa surat from my Gynae. 

Procedure X Ray semua sama you have to take off all your clothes and pakai la the hospital gown, and you need to bring your own pad with you during the X Ray. 

TMI moment

Macam biasa standby position nak bersalin. The doctor inserted her finger first to determine my uterus opening follows by the speculum and  Leech Wilkinson cannula. Besi dik..memang pedih! 

After the Radiologist has standby to do the X Ray, doctor injected some sort of 'dye' atau radiographic contrast into the uterine through vagina and cervix. Masa tu radiologist akan capture the X Ray and directly nampak the flow of the dye at the screen. 

Level sakit: Macam very bad period cramping + ngilu + bloated.

Nangis tak? I did not cry because of the pain, but I did cried bila dengar Radiologist bagitahu the result. Tapi macam biasa doctor akak tu baik gila.. 'You did very well, good job darling, nanti kita jumpa kat atas for discussion'.. haa gitew. lepas cannula tu dikeluarkan, akan ada dye spillage and fresh blood keluar. Haa pakai la pad ye. Tapi akak tak larat nak bangun pun. Sakit sangat. So lepas 5 minit baru bangun and tukar baju. Overall time for the procedure dalam setengah jam saja.  

What was my result? 

Akhirnya kami dapat jawapan yang tak pasti selama 5 tahun ni..I had one opening tube (spillage dye observed) and one blocked tube. Tapi sebab dah tak menahan sangat sakitnya, maka akak tak dengar pon Radiologist cakap which side yang blocked. So nak tak nak kena tunggu report and naik balik office doctor untuk discussion. 

After tunggu report for half an hour, jumpa balik my Gynae and she explained the result to both me and my husband. 
The blocked tube was at the junction of the right side tube. Most probably due to infection from previous abdominal cesarean and caused adhesion/scars at the tube (FYI my 1st born was delivered via LSCS). So ada possibility. What could we do to unblock the tube? Doctor explained ada benefit buat HSG ni. Ada probability the dye pressure boleh unblocked the tube and sometimes over the time, it can unblock naturally. Bila tu tak tahu la. Kalau nak cepat sangat, have to undergo Laparoscopy. Itu cerita lain pulak. 

Now my Gynae wanted to focus on the left tube which is the only opening. Dalam makna lain we only have 50% chances of pregnancy and it is only comes on alternate month. Faham kan? Kilang telur kita keluarkan telur bergilir-gilir setiap bulan. So kenapa asyik tak jadi je during those alternate months? Doctor kata maybe timing we all tak kena and maybe I had anovulatory at the left side.  

My doctor did the tvs (transvaginal scan) untuk tengok which kilang telur yang keluar bulan ni. So it was on the right side, telur memang cantik baqhang tunggu nak menetas lagi 3,4 hari tapi kesian tube blocked, so no chance la dik.. kena tunggu next cycle. 

I will be on prescriptions again; Clomid, Premarin and Duphaston. Apa tu? Ubat untuk matangkan telur dan untuk tebalkan dinding rahim (to make it suitable for implantation). So the next cycle by CD15 kena datang balik untuk tvs for egg monitoring and kalau egg cantik, injection will be given to release the egg. What can we do now? Doctor suruh rehat tenangkan minda pergi bercuti, eh dia macam tau-tau je akak nak pegi bercuti dik.. Penat dah menangis, dengar result, husband akak suruh pegi bercuti. giteww.. 

Overall cost:

HSG X Ray+ Report:  <RM300
TVS: RM200
Doctor Consultation: Free (Haa baik kan doctor hakak)
Prescriptions: RM190

Total: +-RM 690

I did consult some of my doctor friends. Some of them cakap if ada blocked tube memang peluang untuk pregnant sangat susah. Most probably IUI is the best option. But kami redha dulu untuk go for natural TTC and of course IUI and IVF needs a lot of money since insurance doesn't cover most of the fertility treatment. Atau maybe next month we all tukar fikiran untuk go for IUI kan, mana tahu. Kami berusaha, Allah yang lebih mengetahui. Fighting! Wassalam.. 

Thursday, July 21, 2016

TTC Part 7: Pre-Seed

Assalam my fellow TTCian..

Ingat lagi tak bila akak cakap CM akak caca-marba? Lepas makan Kacip Fatimah, Alhamdulillah dah kurang sikit keputihan tapi disebabkan ambil Clomid, masih lagi kering dan tidak menentu those CM discharge. Last month cycle langsung tak jumpa EWCM. Sedih. After consulting my doctor, dia suggest untuk beli je Pre-seed kat pharmacy. Haa dik..macam-macam pharmacy akak pergi tak jumpa ye Pre-Seed. 

Kat Farmasi Caring je akak jumpa.. suka betul lah akak dengan farmasi Caring ni. macam-macam ada. Even Clomid, Premarin, Dupaston pun ada, cuma bila beli kena ada prescription la ye..jangan pandai-pandai beli tapi tak tahu penggunaan nya. Akak pun tak nak bagitahu. Jumpa la doctor anda masing-masing dan dapatkan prescription :) 

Harga Pre-Seed kat Farmasi Caring dalam RM100++ dan ada 9 disposable applicator untuk masukkan lubricant vaginally. Macam ni la kotaknya. 

Memang best la pakai Pre-Seed ni during BD dan paling best dia 'sperm-friendly' and dapat support sperm untuk travel ke Fallopian tube. Pre-seed ni memang sesuai sangat dan match dengan our body fertile fluids. EWCM memang paling penting untuk meningkatkan lagi persenyawaan tapi kalau tak ada boleh la try Pre-Seed. Akak dah pakai 2 cycle, tapi belum berjaya mungkin ada masalah lain. huu! Selamat mencuba Pre-Seed :)
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